I have been asked to pass on the following message to Three Bean Salad Podcast:
Esteemed Beans,
Your recent episode, “Elevators”, was so flagrant in its profligate use of jingles that I feel I must break my silence and share my top secret research project.
Unlike many, I don’t use your podcast to go to sleep. But I do use it to wake up, and the jingles really get me out of bed. Knowing the exact timings of each episode is crucial for my scientific lifestyle. I have therefore scientifically catalogued every jingle and cross-referenced it against every episode.
At this trying time for public health you may be concerned that I’m diverting scientific attention from more pressing matters. Nothing could be further from the truth: it’s better for public health that I do remain at home and out of the lab, I am assured.
I have so far been unable to draw any conclusions from my research, but you may find it useful for accountancy purposes.
Professor Potamogdon